Counseling theory

Marriage for the wrong reasons, such as money or a need for identity, is the top cause of divorce worldwide. Inability to solve difficulties and a lack of common vision, on the other hand, might lead to divorce. For example, Maryann, a 28-year-old female friend who works as an accountant. After three years of marriage to a teacher, she has two children. Their marriage, though, has been fraught with conflict. They chose divorce due to their inability to resolve their concerns in an understandable manner. Maryann is deeply impacted by the choice because she hoped to raise her children alongside her father.The paper aims at applying person-centered therapy in solving Maryann’s situation.
Person-centered therapy was developed by Carl Rogers who is an American psychologist. The approach work by how an individual recognize or perceive himself relative to the perception of the counselor in interpreting his ideas and thoughts (Richard J, 179). Also, the approach shows the tendency of man increasing to potentiality. In most cases, the ability is interfered as a result of life experiences and problems in our daily lives, especially the issues that lower self-esteem. In this situation, the psychotherapists work by fully understanding a person’s problem from their perspective. The counselor should value the client with the understanding they are human beings with emotions and feelings. However, he should aim for a genuine and open conversation to make the client have self-worth and inner values so that they can move forward in dealing with the situation (Chao, 126).

Moreover, the principle is a talk therapy where the client talks much. The work of the therapy is to listen carefully without making judgments or interpretations. Frequently, the counselor repeats the words for clarity or to make the client sure of her meaning. Silent moments follow for the thoughts to sink in profoundly. According to Liam (33), the central importance of this principle is the fact that it encourages self-acceptance, self-worth, and self-discovery thus providing a mean to positive growth and healing. Also, the talk enables one to speak his mind and thus facilitates the general healing.

As a result of divorce, Maryann had a feeling of anxiety, guilt, loneliness, despair, depression, frustration, devastation, fear and grief. The sense of guilt was because she perceived divorce as a result of her failures in marriage. She feels low and wants to turn back table, thinking she can make the married better and the married to work. However, therapy helps her to get rid of her mixed emotions and look at the end of separation from different perspectives. According to research, most of the people who have experience divorce have high knowledge of the requirements that are needed in a healthy relationship and negativities in a relationship. Therapy opens their mind to understand themselves better as far as their nature is concerned (Liam, 34).

Furthermore, she felt sad ending her marriage. Grief, however painful, it is a healthy response to divorce. Many academic records show that divorce is more painful than losing loved ones since one drops the morale of life. The process of recovery has a beginning, middle part, and the end. After going through the series of grief, pain, and suffering, one heals and starts a new life. Sadness and grief are because of the thought of ending the serious relationship and the fact that she will be single for an unknown period, possibly, a very long time. Also, having to change the living, financial and social lifestyles brings a lot of sadness. She felt depressed thinking of how she was going to cope up with life after divorce and the changes that are needed. All these emotions made her miserable making her cry all night and spending most of the time in bed.

Maryann’s emotions are natural reactions that accompany a problematic situation. Despite the fact that there is no appropriate ‘cure’ for such feeling, there are healthy and proper ways to handle the situation. One of the ways is visiting a psychotherapist. As a result, the suffering will reduce, one gains wisdom and learns how to manage similar problems in future as well as having a sense of compassion and relief. One overcomes the pain and suffering. A psychotherapist helps people with such situation to overcome their afflictions.

Being a close friend to Maryann, I could use the principles of personal-centered therapy to help her overcome her problems. First, I could use congruence as stated by Chao (122). This is being genuine and open to her without hiding the genuineness behind my career. I will put my feelings open during the therapy session to make Maryann comfortable in sharing her emotions with me. However, I will refrain from disclosing my issues to avoid focusing the therapy session on me. By doing that Maryann will feel encouraged to display her emotions fully by crying, shouting and pausing among others.

Also, I will not be judgmental but rather accept Maryann the way she is. I will not disapprove specific actions, feelings or behaviors without censoring or evaluating. By doing that she will get the impression of my sincere willingness to listen to her without judging, interrupting or giving advice. For that reason, I would have created an excellent environment that will make her feel free to share hostile, painful, abnormal feelings and defensive without fear of losing me as a friend.

Moreover, I will have empathy to understand her experience in tacking divorce emotions and pain. I will follow and appreciate her situation the way she explains displaying sensitivity and emotional understanding of her feelings. Showing empathy to Maryann will be an initial phase of the therapeutic process to begin as far as person-centered therapy is concerned. Furthermore, to convey compassion, I will listen to her actions while showing attention and understanding to what she says (Richard J, 180). This involves maintaining eye contact which is an attribute of a good listener. After she explains some of the emotions, I will use reflection as a method to paraphrase and summarize what she has said. This will enable her to be clear and sure of her meaning. Also, the technique will act as an assurance to Maryann that I was listening accurately and carefully. On the other hand, she will scrutinize her feelings and thoughts after I repeat her words.

Therefore, various principles can guide one in dealing with stressful situations in life. For instance, person-centered therapy is one of the best theories. The client does most of the talking as the therapist listens without judging or giving advice. The client expresses her emotions without fear thus relieving herself from stress, guilt, depression, and sadness just to mention a few. Individuals undergoing different kinds of pressure should opt person-centered therapy as a possible solution stress.

Works cited

Hazler, Richard J. "Person-centered theory." Counseling and psychotherapy: Theories and interventions (2009): 179-201.

Chao, Ruth Chu‐Lien. "Person‐Centered Therapy." Counseling Psychology: An Integrated Positive Psychological Approach: 112-128.

Clarke, Liam. "Person-centered therapy." Mental Health Practice8.9 (2015): 33-34.